Why the Duality of Business and Pleasure Does Not Work – Part 2
I am an integrator. And it is my business to know how to do that and help others do the same.
Humanity has been struggling with the tension of living in dualities since the beginning of time. This four-part series will discuss the impact of living in this tension and the need to integrate.
Part Two: We form experiences and attach meaning to them.
IDENTITY and its SHADOW
As we form experiences and attach meaning to them, we are in the process of creating our identity. Our shadow, our reflection of our identity, although not always visible, is always attached to us. Or is it? Not according to James M. Barrie’s Peter Pan:
“ “I wasn’t crying about mothers,” he said rather indignantly. “I was crying because I can’t get my shadow to stick on. Besides, I wasn’t crying.”
“It has come off?”
Then Wendy saw the shadow on the floor, looking so draggled, and she was frightfully sorry for Peter. “How awful!” she said, but she could not help smiling when she saw that he had been trying to stick it on with soap…
…”It must be sewn on,” she said…
“What’s sewn?” he asked.
…”I shall sew it on for you…” she said…and sewed the shadow on to Peter’s foot.
“I daresay it will hurt a little,” she warned him.
“Oh, I shan’t cry,” said Peter, who was already of the opinion that he had never cried in his life. And he clenched his teeth and did not cry, and soon his shadow was behaving properly, though still a little creased.”
Metaphorically speaking, Peter Pan’s identity of an individual who chooses to never grow up and is the leader of a group called “the lost boys”, becomes detached from his shadow, or a reflection of his identity. He is reattached to his shadow through Wendy’s sewing skills; a process of “stitching” back together. We are told that it was a painful process.
How does this translate to our day to day reality?
In what state of attachment or detachment are we with our shadow, the reflection of our identity?
Is it visible to us?
Are we aware of it and how it is shaped and formed?
Are we aware of what it reflects?
We cannot begin to answer questions related to the challenges in our personal or professional lives if we are not consciously aware of the integration of all aspects of our identity; how it is shaped, formed and reflected outside of ourselves for us and others to see.
We popularize the duality of light and dark into good and evil. In this way, we tend to talk of a shadow in a negative way; sinister or foreboding. We tend to not want to see what is “lurking” in the shadow.
Yet, in Jungian psychology, the shadow or “shadow aspect” may refer to the “the entirety of the unconscious, i.e., everything of which a person is not fully conscious. [Both negative and positive aspects] may also remain hidden in one’s shadow…the Jungian shadow can include everything outside the light of consciousness… Jung wrote:
You can read the first part in this series by clicking here